Wexford Training Newsletter

Vol 1., Issue 34

December 2025

Wexford Training Newsletter

Finding Balance from the Inside Out

Dear Friends,

I guess my last newsletter was a foreshadowing of my own life, how serendipitous. This past month has provided a barrage of sudden, unexpected changes that interrupted all regular schedules and called for significant adjustments. Today I am sitting at my laptop with both my wifi and cell service not working. It took a minute to remember I do still have power and can work without a digital connection to the world. The uploading, emails and so forth will just have to wait. If this newsletter is a bit late, that’s why.

I know this is very last minute because of my wifi being out, but the Art of The Horseman Online Horse Fair has one last FREE weekend on December 6-7. The link for your free tickets is at the bottom of this newsletter.

Enjoy!

Kirsten
kirsten.wexford@gmail.com

P.S.
As a subscriber, please feel free to share this or any of my newsletters with other horse lovers! If you have not signed up yet, just click the link to get on the mailing list: https://kirstennelsen.com/#newsletter

Thoughts to Ponder

"It is not a daily increase, but a daily decrease.
Hack away at the inessentials.”
- Bruce Lee

Finding Stillness in the Middle

So let’s pick up where we left off…. Changing something about ourselves is a scary proposition, always a last resort.

Somewhere between have-to and want-to changes are initiated anyway.

As soon as we are in the thick of it we feel a strong craving to stop, repeat old habits or retreat back into familiar patterns. This is our body’s survival instinct, a part of us that is highly skeptical of anything new, different or unfamiliar.

…Knowing these things intellectually is more helpful than it might seem at first. Knowing that my body is hard wired for survival, that uncomfortable emotions are how my body alerts my brain to danger, allowed a little space as challenging situations stacked up.

Balance, that I talk about all the time, is stillness in motion, the center of the spinning wheel of change, an integration of opposites. Balance always creates stillness, brings a sense of ease in the middle of chaos or strong forces. Seeking stillness, pausing when I can, slowing my breath and softening my body all send messages to my nervous system that I am safe, right here, right now at least, and better decisions are the result.

Balance is always three dimensional, meaning a mental quietness, emotional equilibrium and physical ease of motion. Physical balance involves another three dimensions, the physical body, and another three dimensions of the physical world in which we move plus all those forces that we deal with while just living our lives. It’s complicated. The simplicity within all that complexity is that I am the center of it and I can consciously seek balance when I lose it. Each one of us is the center of our own lives that the wheel of change spins around. When we can quiet ourselves as the center, we don’t succumb to that horrible spinning feeling that happens on the outer edges.

Seeking balance, especially when my body is on high alert during stressful situations, is how I begin. Intellectually I know that the only thing I can really control is myself and even that requires a lifetime of practice. Finding calmness under pressure or when my buttons are pushed is an acquired skill that was hammered into me by horses. It took a minute for me to figure out that I can apply that skill to all kinds of non-horse situations. This past month remaining calm under pressure came up for further development as multiple members of my family suddenly faced significant health challenges.

Finding my mental and emotional balance still does not feel easy. It is a practice. I still tend to distract myself first with familiar things and avoid being quiet, as we do. We all have to stretch ourselves in order to find calmness or mental focus when the body goes into automatic high alert. Knowing how our minds and bodies actually work can allow a little detachment from reacting in ways that make things worse. Seeking stillness, even if only for a minute, allows us to observe ourself and compassionately sooth our inner self like we would our best friend.

Finding moments to pause, breath a little slower and soften my body helped me stay close to the stillness in the middle of the spinning wheel of changes. With both my wifi and cell service going down for days, quietness suddenly found me. Be careful what you wish for!

With unexpected extra quiet time I thought about how the situations were not going to change, but I could. The horses, animals, plants and the world were not going to stop for my inner turmoil and being emotionally exhausted was not going to help anything.

Walking my talk about balance is where the rubber meets the road. It is both humbling and encouraging to know we are all wired the same way, with the same instincts and the same ability to find balance in the midst of chaos. It is not easy to find balance in our mind or body once we are triggered into stress, but knowing it is possible helps us reach for it and get better at finding it each time, despite what is happening all around us.

Did You Know?

FREE TICKETS

Last minute I know but there is one more weekend for the The Art of the Horseman Online Horse Fair this year. Below is the link for free tickets to use and share. Hope you can check it out!
December 6 - 7

FREE TICKETS: https://www.becauseofthehorse.net/a/23333/a2zsSgDH

Please feel free to share this link as much as you like!

Free Ticket to Horse Fair

Upcoming Events

View the Calendar

To join a scheduled clinic, please contact the coordinator directly. To book a clinic, please contact me directly at kirsten.wexford@gmail.com

To find an area coordinator near you and help organize a clinic, please see my list of area coordinators https://kirstennelsen.com/clinic-coordinators/