January 2026
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Wexford Training Newsletter
Finding Balance from the Inside Out
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Dear Friends,
Happy New Year! I don’t know about you but 2025 felt like it went by really fast. Am I showing my age? Sometimes minutes feel like hours and sometimes hours feel like minutes. Then all of a sudden it is the passing of another year. I hope 2026 brings you many blessings and more time with your horse!
I am hoping to get some feedback from you this month if you have a minute. My 2026 goal is to really enhance what you receive from me for being on this email list. Your thoughts and suggestions would be helpful. Please have a look at the "did you know?" segment at the bottom of this newsletter.
Enjoy!
Kirsten
kirsten.wexford@gmail.com
P.S.
As a subscriber, please feel free to share this or any of my newsletters with other horse lovers! If you have not signed up yet, just click the link to get on the mailing list: https://kirstennelsen.com/#newsletter
"I found my place when I stopped looking for it.”
- Mahershala Ali
Learning a New Coordination Is the Hard Part
I was making a video for my YouTube channel the other day and just as I was getting on a horse named Alex, who had not been ridden in several months, my cat came dashing across the arena with a squirrel in his mouth. Mercury, the cat, ran right between the camera and the mounting block where I had just gotten on Alex. Another squirrel that was still the tree was having a meltdown, then Alex had a meltdown from all excitement going on around us. My plan for the video was to show how well Alex was balancing his physical coordination, but that went out the window as soon as he spooked. The video is now about how to calm an anxious horse when unexpected things happen.
When I first met Alex he was always anxious. Helping him become a calm, focused horse initially took some time and a lot of patience. Now being in a calm, focused state is a strong habit, meaning Alex is that way most of the time, but that doesn’t mean he can’t be triggered. The difference now is that Alex can work through a spook, high anxiety or a stress response much faster than ever before. Being scared does not feel good, so he looks for the help I can offer in order to feel safe again, seeking that good feeling even while spooked. Restoring calmness is just not a big deal anymore, even in unexpected situations.
Alex became a chronically anxious horse partially because of his unstable movement, his poor habits of physical coordination that were taking their toll over time. Feeling unstable during motion causes the body to feel unsafe most of the time, so horses and people remain anxious, on high alert and are easily triggered into stress or fear once physical coordination is habitually dysfunctional.
Learning or restoring healthy habits of physical coordination is the hard part, for all living bodies. Coordination is the habitual way human or horse anatomy organizes. When we want to do something new, better or improve our horse’s movement, we and horses have to go through a slow process of discovering, then integrating a new way of using the same old anatomy. Coordination is something that develops or changes very slowly. It requires lots of little steps and lots of repetition. Once a new coordination is integrated in the nervous system then everything speeds up again with more efficient use.
This lesson is actually more from the cat, Mercury, who really is a solid that acts like a liquid.
For the four years Mercury has been with me he has practiced squirrel hunting daily but never actually caught one. He does sprints from the ground into trees, climbs out on thin outer branches, takes naps in tree limbs and hangs out under the oak trees with me like a dog whenever I work horses. He watches squirrels a lot and practices skills for the fun of it.
Mercury is never demoralized when he falls short, fails to accomplish his ultimate task. He rests when he is tired and doesn’t worry when squirrels outwit him. He enjoys the process of his self-motivated training every single day. It is his practice for the sake of enjoyment, a cat enjoying being a cat.
What really struck me the day of the video fiasco was the fact that it was Mercury’s second successful squirrel hunt. It took Mercury four years to catch his first squirrel, then he caught a second squirrel three weeks later. This is a great example of how physical coordination develops slowly with lots of repetition, but once integrated the body becomes more efficient. Mercury figured out a new coordination called “squirrel catching” but was never concerned about how long it would take or all those times he failed to actually accomplish his goal.
As riders, dreaming about what we want to do with our horses, we often fail to enjoy the process of training. We are easily frustrated, worry about the time it takes for us or our horse to develop better coordination and feel anxious about reaching our goals. But we all ride because we love the feeling of riding. We all have a horse because we love horses. I find it helpful to remember those things when progress feels slow, repetitive or boring. And Mercury provided a strong reminder to me that on the other side of practicing all these ingredients of coordination lies the ease, efficiency and grace of mastering coordination. The time it takes doesn't really matter when we enjoy the process.
For the new year one of my goals is to provide more value to all of you who have signed up to be on this email list. I sincerely appreciate your interest in my work and appreciate you subscribing to this newsletter, especially because we are all so inundated with emails.
I am just not exactly sure how to provide more value to you, or what to offer. So I could really use your help and suggestions. If you have a minute to drop me an email, you can simply reply to my questions or make your own suggestions. Again, much appreciated knowing how busy we are.
Questions I have...
- Do you like the monthly "thoughts to ponder" stories/lessons
- Do you find the "did you know" segment helpful or useful?
- Is the upcoming clinic schedule helpful to include?
- Do you feel like the newsletter is too long or too short?
- Would more pics or videos be better or take too long to load?
- Do you value more stories or more how-to information?
To join a scheduled clinic, please contact the coordinator directly. To book a clinic, please contact me directly at kirsten.wexford@gmail.com
To find an area coordinator near you and help organize a clinic, please see my list of area coordinators https://kirstennelsen.com/clinic-coordinators/
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Lake Wales, Florida
February 7-8
Coordinator: Nancy 863-528-2570
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Baltimore, Maryland
April 11-12
June 20-21
August 15-16
October 17-18
Coordinator: Ginny 443-250-8017 or hqueen13@gmail.com
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